Sunday, July 06, 2008


Come out, come out, wherever you are!

What happened to spring?Let me get cleaned up and then we can visit.Sorry, I really didn't mean to abandon my blog.

Sometimes you just need a break from this cancer thing and sometimes that break just goes on and on. Actually, I have multiple reasons for not posting for so long. Probably the main reason was that for much of the first part of the time I was gone I was not in a very good mood and I didn't want to come here and just whine. I was a real bear! I couldn't figure out why I felt that way, but I was angry a lot and not real pleasant to be around and I did not like it. Finally, after prayer and thinking about it for awhile, it dawned on me that the testosterone replacement is really a steroid and steroids and I don't play well together. So, on my own, I stopped taking my daily dose. After a few weeks I was feeling pretty much back to normal. Then I told Cheryl what I had done. She said she wondered what happened because she noticed a definite difference in my mood and attitude. When I told my doctor what I did, he said, "yep, that will do it." So, I would rather be more tired than more angry. I think it is a good trade.

At some point I signed on to one of my patient support sites for the first time in weeks and the first thing I read was a post by a young lady from Ireland whose mother just died from CLL. I closed out without even sending condolences which is not like me.

About the time I was going to get back to joining my on line friends and reading blogs, etc., my computer died. In fact, within about a week, my cell phone died, my printer died, my laptop died and my desktop finally about totally gave up the bits and bites. I'm just glad I don't have a pacemaker. First I got a new phone, then a new multifunction printer, then finally got my laptop repaired for a couple of hundred dollars and a wait for a part to come in. My desktop computer is still taking up space. But it gives Cheryl something to get on me about. Ha! Sorry, dear!

It's funny, but I really was feeling quite guilty for not posting and yet I still kept putting it off. I would sign on to write, and end up playing Bejeweled 2 Deluxe! I am addicted to it. But all of this reminded me of my procrastination days in school. I always put off assignments until the last minute. I thought I would join procrastinators anonymous, but I just haven't gotten around to it yet.

Slowly I have been getting back and trying to catch up. Unfortunately, while I was away, some fine folks lost their battle to this stinking disease. I will write about them in a day or two. I also lost friends to non-cancer reasons. Actually I have lots of news I want to write about but not now.

In health news, my disease is remaining stable. It is only progressing slowly and this month the blood work actually looked better than last month! My platelets have been over 100 for several months now. All I am doing is IVIg infusions and I am now able to do them only every other month -- YEA! They really aren't bad, but they do take six to seven hours and a lovely little bottle of STEROIDS come with them. So that night I stay up and then sometimes have breakfast with Cheryl before she goes to work. They also give me headaches for about two weeks, but I think that part is even getting better. The important part is, it works! Last year I had nine infections in ten months, including pneumonia twice. Since starting this last November, I have had one slight cold and that is all.

Thanks for checking in with me.


David Arenson said...


It's great to have you back, and that of course includes your sense of humor and your insights.

I think we all need a break from CLL now and then, a time to just forget about it or ignore it or not be concerned with it. Being a patient is hard work and we need to build in some vacation time.

Glad to hear your remission is holding and that the IVIg is keeping the infections at bay.

Grateful said...

It's good to have you back with good news!

Anonymous said...

I thought just maybe I would check and see if your had come out of hiding and you had! So glad to hear that things are going well with you. Probably better for all involved to have you tired rather than grumpy. I have missed your humor. Your writing lift my spirits and help me make it a great day!